Vodafone jargon
For those new to the mobile operator world, you might find the glossary of terminology I've collected over my time at Vodafone Group helpful:
- """I'm listening to music and I don't have a chair""" -- no one has dialled into the teleconference except you
- (deep) dive -- throwing yourselves into an action without much preparation
- ROM -- rough order of magnitude
- alignment -- get our shit together
- analytics -- impressive graphs
- deck -- a presentation
- drilling -- detailing
- drop off -- hang up on the teleconference call
- e-learning -- learning how to use a computer
- end of play or C.O.D. or C.O.B. -- end of the working day (or before start of next working day)
- escalate this -- let your manager speak to your colleague's manager
- exco -- Group Executive Committee
- flat -- very little (or none)
- gatekeeper -- self-important person who solely controls a process
- good question -- i have no idea
- KPI -- key performance indicators (what a bonus is probably tied to)
- leverage -- use of a tool or contact to do something
- loop in -- mail everyone again (annoyingly) adding another participant
- manage expectations -- work out how to fuddle goals
- onboarding -- integrating a system (usually a very very painful because it doesn't work)
- one to one (or face-to-face) -- a private meeting between two people
- owning a decision -- figuring out who is to blame
- push back -- say no, resist a decision or action
- quick win -- "low hanging fruit", solve the easier problems, do this first without thinking
- ramp up - bring up to speed on events or issues
- reach out -- talk to someone
- rolling off the project -- being fired
- schedule a meeting -- schedule a time wasting teleconference with Outlook without an agenda
- screen protectors -- facebook filter
- slipped -- missed a target
- sync up -- lets get together
- take this offline -- take it off the voice conference or talk later
- that's TBD -- I don't know
- to go nuclear -- last resort / worse case scenario
- touch base -- get in touch (not about cocaine)
- WFH -- "working" from home or as one colleague suggests "Watching daytime TV" or doing house renovations